Whenever I think of soul mates I think of two friends of mine who have been dating for around ten years. When spending time with them, one of them said to me, "I want to find my soul mate--the one who is easy and accommodating and everything goes smoothly with them." Then they both burst into laughter. They knew they were each others biggest teachers. They were learning all of the lessons they chose to learn with each other and sometimes this wasn't easy. What kept them together was their strong soul connection and love and the ability to work through whatever came up. They worked on their individual issues with a village of practitioners plus they talked through whatever came up for them. They also accepted each others weaknesses despite bouts of irritation with each other.
We're now at a time in history where being in relationship, especially marriage, has changed considerably. Especially our expectations. The old model was mostly built on a business premise: The man was to be financially stable and support his family (including his wife) and the woman was to be attractive, have children and keep a good home. This was the criteria for being in a relationship. Once married, you stayed married even if the marriage was abusive or didn't actually fit the model since now it was too late. You just had to make due.
Now everyone wants to be with their best friend and lover--their soul mate. What does this really mean? There's uncertainty about whether to maintain these old roles which creates confusion. Some women still want the financially stable man who will protect them and take care of them; some men still want the beautiful wife who will be solely responsible for taking care of them, the children and the home. Some women want a financially strong, protective man in theory but don't want to lose their freedom or feel controlled by them. Some men want the beautiful, domestic women in theory but are bored with actually living with this type of woman. Others are less sure about what they want.
What do we really want in an intimate relationship? I think we're all trying to figure this out as we go thus the high divorce rate and number of people who never marry at all. Our closest soul group members are helping us learn these lessons by being the karmic glue so we feel stuck with the learning until its learned. Once we've learned with this person, we may move into a new stage with them or move on to another soul group member to learn the next leg of the lesson. We've all picked a different script for learning in what this new relationship model is for humanity.
As each of us learn and grow into what it means to really unconditionally love another human being and what it means to accept that person while still honoring our own needs, we begin creating a new collective model since we're all interconnected. What is learned by one person or one soul group team is energetically picked up on by other individuals and soul groups. We're all helping each other come up with this new model.
Things to think about when contemplating intimate relationship
- What are your expectations for an intimate relationship? Are you more traditional in your expectations, conflicted on what you want, or very non-traditional? If conflicted, what is the conflict about? If non-traditional, what does this really mean to you?
- What issues do/did you see being repeated in each relationship you've been in? Example: always attracting unavailable men/women, attracting women/men with a temper, attracting an addict, etc.
- What part do you see yourself playing with these repeat patterns?
- Have you made any progress with your current partner in resolving these issues or in attracting people that are less like the old patterns/issues?
- What gifts did/do you bring into the relationship(s)? What gifts does/did your partner(s) or those you've dated bring to you?
- What would you like to see in an your ideal, intimate relationship? Is it realistic? Is it healthy? How will it serve you and your partner to have this type of relationship?
We're figuring out, as a collective, how to be in intimate relationship. I believe the goal is to unconditionally love each other and accept each other even if the relationship can't work out.
We're all Divine Beings figuring out a new way of Being in the world during this portal into higher consciousness we're entering. Share with all of us what you think of as a loving, accepting, long term relationship. We can all help each other look at this model differently so we can more easily and quickly create an optimal one for humanity.
Maureen, your blog is always so inspiring and spot-on. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences with such candor. Each post has helped me. They are posted at just the right time. It's uncanny...and, of course, meant to be. Thank you for helping me on my journey!
Thank you Katy! So glad they're helping and in the perfect timing. :)
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